I really don't know what to think and what to do. Seems like I've ruined relations with all my classmates.
It began when I started to skip too many classes in my university. I'm a third-year student but I just feel like it's not what I want in my life. It was hard to bear it all and to do any assignments because everything seemed pointless to me. This is when crap began. I wanted to build a wall between my personal little world and everything else. I deleted my classmates from my friend list because I was practically trembling every time I saw their icons. They were reminding me of my university when I wanted to actually forget that that thing existed at all. I didn't feel comfortable knowing my posts would appear in their news feed, I didn't want them to know what's going on in my life in my head as well, at least for a time being. I never felt any support from them, though, they have never been really rude to me or anything. So, I did what I did.
And they took it personally. I checked new posts in our community and some of them were "I'm not going to connect to somebody who deleted me from a friend list and is just bitching around now" or "we haven't done anything to her in 3 years and she just deleted us not trying to explain anything".
I said I was sorry, I tried to explain briefly but I feel like it's not enough to improve the situation. Oh craaap. I really didn't mean anything rude, I didn't want to give them an impression like I'm bitching around, I didn't mean to offend, I just wanted to, like, to be alone for some time. And I can't explain them THAT. Because I'm simply afraid they'll tell me to fuck off or just ignore me etc. Because I feel like I'm all alone and they all are against me. Because of what I did. Because I skip classes and don't take part in our group projects. Because I behave like shit.
I can't talk to my professors about this situation as well because I was so lucky to spoil relations with them, too.
I'm just in a big ass and I have no idea what to do. And where to start from.